halfnoises

It was weird just now when the lamp next to me made a clicking, popping noise at THE EXACT TIME MOMENT the music on my computer froze into silence. It was like a power outage of sorts, except I couldn't figure out why my computer screen was still lit and animating, silently. I wondered if I had maybe, suddenly (and instantly) lost my hearing?

But it was just a total timing coincidence. No reason why they should've been related.

Weird Also: When I type, the animal footsteps upstairs start scuttling around and knocking objects over. When I stop, it stops. What is it, and how did it get there? It sounds heavy and crazed.

At least... I hope it's Animal.


x_x

Uh
Oh
um
ah
Ugh
agh
ogh
ack
ach
bah
doh
gruh
huh
haha

damn
shit
fuck
dude
whoa

egh, eee
oooh
aaahhh
um
what

okay

what

okay

what

yeah

This hand soap they have is "Fresh Cut Grass" scent, so you can smell like you just mowed your lawn when you go back to your books?

Uhhhh today feels like a weird day, it is rainstorming out but that means it'll be a good puppet show turnout, people won't want to be outside.

Participating in NaNoWriMo again, clocking in at 17,000 words as of yesterday.

Tomorrow I go back to the Mystery Trail!

What should I do in Taiwan/Hong Kong/China?

(my life, a horrible and wonderful labyrinth)

i got the flu & we got 3 shows back-to-back tomorrow


i want to update,

but, NYQUIL

Just got back from New Jersey last night, after the opening show of Caps for Sale. We drove through light snow flurry with the headlights on and music in the car.

Today I got my passport book applied for at the Post Office in White River Junction, and walked a mile downhill to the "Tuckerbox" for a BLT. I'm farming dreadlocks because I forgot my comb in a hotel somewhere. This cotton turtleneck grows lint balls on the neck, where the skin touches and moves around a lot against the fabric. Or else who ever owned this before I did was a snotty girl who wiped in the collar.

I am obsessed with different facets of myself and one of them was whatever freaking thing I was for Halloween. More details to come when I realize them. Also: possible zine project(s) and radio show draft (based on the Puppeteer Spaceship, our car rides in between towns) in development.

Hoping the Mystery Trail will be inviting this month, would like to finish my book.

i rode my skateboard down the street at midnight, in bright red demon-mask; the piles of autumn leaf-shed slowed me down a little; it was, sort of, you know, a 1980's daydream, at night

Things to Do in Providence:

1. Refill the Qvar
2. Get new passport
3. Abuse Halloween
4. Impromptu performance


Looking forward to being immature; Desperately needing a break from spending all my time with "older people" this Fall. They walk upright and have witty conversations and share stories of their experiences- but I only want to be an Animal, for awhile-

Shadow Play: THE LEGEND OF SLEEPY HOLLOW

First show at an elementary school in Peabody, MA (near Boston)- My first show with real audience reaction! I was surprised at how noisy the children were for the entire performance: Giggling, laughing, murmuring, chattering, even little groans and moans when "scary puppets" popped up on the screen.
They even shouted out names of objects during the dream sequence, unanimously, "Chicken! Pig! Bacon! PIE!"

Oh, it was SO SATISFYING. And later they'd come up and say, "You guys were awesome! Can I see the Washington puppet dance again? How did you make the cow?"

Tonight we're lodging at a motel in New York but tomorrow up early in the morning for a show at the New Rochelle Library, and an afternoon off in Tarrytown, around the site of the real thing, the real Sleepy Hollow. I'm looking forward to seeing that bridge the Headless Horseman chucks his pumpkin head at Ichabod Crane, the soundtrack violins playing in my head too; that story is really growing on me.

-

From December 26th to February 14th, I will be spending New Year's AND Chinese New Year's with Wai-Po-Po in Taiwan, Hong Kong, and China. Getting in touch with the motherland, brushing up on my Chinese, and sketchbooking so hard. It would be ideal if I could study the art of Chinese Shadow Puppetry... More details to come.

Ann gives me money for groceries. I stay here for free, on a dusty blue couch-bed in her daughter's deserted bedroom. My bedsheets have lilac-colored cartoon lips on them. I enjoy poking through the drawers and finding things her daughter left behind, like old photographs of her boyfriend, and piles of silver jewelry. I don't like the paintings on the walls though, so I've flipped them all upside down.

Her name is Caitlin and she has long, caramel-colored hair. I know this because she left her high school ID on top of the old dresser. I also know that she used to own a Hello-Kitty themed checkbook. Ann mentioned that she's currently not talking to them, I wonder if it's a "rebellious phase"? Brad says she's homeless in Virginia somewhere... but that everyone has "until thirty" to blame everything on their parents, and she's only twenty-one.

After dinner, I have the rest of the night to myself. Sometimes I take short walks down the road. The nearest "urban area" is at least ten miles away... though there is a "village mart" about a mile down the hill. They sell metallic keychain-rings on a piece of cardboard, with a cheapo drawing of shapely female buttocks (in denim) on it.

I plan on writing letters to some friends. The internet is limited, cell phones don't work, and I've upgraded my Netflix to "3-DVDs-at-a-time." I also have my sketchbook and some basic art supplies, as well as a reading list.

1. Puppetry: a World History
2. The Electric Kool-aid Acid Test
3. Three Cups of Tea
4. Godel, Escher, Bach: an Eternal Golden Braid
5. Cat's Cradle


Oh, it gets cold up here. I'm already wearing layers, and a scarf. A small rose plant lives by my bedroom window and I hope it survives Autumn, at the least. Sometimes I wake up and don't believe I can rise... but then, I've been able to, so far.

I am now living in a house-and-barn in rural Vermont with two older people, Ann Legunn and her 71-year-old husband Joel, and Brad Shur, a Providence puppet-nerd. Ann has two spoiled dogs: a golden pom named "Bob Marley" and a black border collie named "Sophie."

Every day we build and rehearse for two shows, from 10am to 6pm, and we "clock in and out" by ballpoint pen, on lined paper.

The first one is an "international" version of the childrens' book, "Caps for Sale," involving a variety of monkey puppets and me- in a gorilla suit! I like that I get to be a monkey in lots of different ways. With my hands, my voice, and with my body, and in costume, and shadow puppets! I'm also assigned the part of spinning a globe in circles to old-timey piano music.

The second is a shadow-puppet play of "The Legend of Sleepy Hollow", with more than a hundred and fifty paper puppets. We haven't gotten to working on that one yet, but we will next week.

We already have twenty-seven shows booked for the next two months, and Ann is trying to book at least five more. That's a lot! I'll be either in Vermont or traveling by van until December, with the exception of Halloween; We're gonna hit up schools and libraries in NY, NJ, NH, MA, VT, and RI.

I've not felt lonely yet, however, I do jump on any chance I get to leave the house and go into the village, or nearby towns. I take every opportunity to see other people, do other things, which is not very often (a few times a week? If someone happens to be driving). Last Saturday, I tagged along on an errand and bought myself a coffee ice cream cone.
It's not that home life is stale- I'm merely taking precautionary measures, to prevent that from happening.

Phyllis the downstairs neighbor-friend, is watching Twin Peaks. She may be watching it by herself, but she may also be watching it with someone else, who would likely be her current male interest, "Mike."

I know this because I can hear the soundtrack coming up through the floor at the end of my bed.

You know the cool jazzy keyboard sounds and the trumpets wah-wahs and the descending walking bassline from Audrey's sexy cafe dance? That, and Agent Cooper's voice. I'm hearing them muffled, as if I'm in a giant pillow bubble, underwater.

The sound of TV somewhere-else-in-the-house, it's so... reassuring. When I'm a rich and lonely old haggy witch, I'll have a house with a TV in the "other bedroom" that I keep on all night to help me fall asleep.

1) Ralph Nader chair
"Yes, that's right. Ralph Nader, perennial Green Party candidate for the U.S. presidency MAY have sat in this very chair! It was used in his Washington, DC campaign headquarters until I purchased it on Craiglist several months ago. It has a nice red, commie upholstery and a sleek black plastic backing. The wheels don't function well, but that is a small price to pay for state control of the means of production."

2) I want some orange juice
"I'll give you $2 + cost if you'll deliver me some orange juice with receipt. I'm too lazy to get it myself. I live right by University Drive in Elon. Thank you."

3) Seeking adult drunk clown for 30th birthday party
"We need an Adult Drunk Clown who is good at getting drunk and stupid. No need to do any clown tricks, just hang out and drink a shit load. We will be hopping around to different bars and want a clown to tag a long and drink heavely. He doesn't even need to socialize with anyone, just drink."

4) Duck mask
"Full head rubber mask, old, has discoloration on white feather part from age, storage. Hey I got it on my big head, so it works that way."

5) Woman to sit in my bath tub full of noodles, wearing a bathing suit
"I will pay you $1 to sit in my bathtub full of noodles while you wear a one piece bathing suit. I will not be home, nor will anyone else while you do this. I will leave the key for you, and you will sit at your leisure. DO NOT bring any sauce. I will season the pasta after I return home prior to dinner."

6) Wanted: Pony
"My kid is having a birthday coming up soon, and there'll be a lot of children around, so I figured I'd better get a pony. If you do have a pony you could sell, please contact me, and then immediately start putting barbeque sauce in it's bedding or add some Lawry's to it's salt lick - I like to marinade it early and long, so that the flavor is at it's peak by the time I take possession."

7) I have a huge bathroom
"I am a female in my mid 60's and I am looking for a room mate. Times are tight and I need some extra money. I am willing to rent out my bathroom in my 1 bedroom east village home. My bathroom is large. You can easily put a twin air mattress in there. I only ask that when I need to use the bathroom, you or your air mattress are not in it. I do ask that when you are in the apartment, you confine yourself to the bathroom. I do not feel comfortable with a stranger walking around my living room. This might change as I get to know you better."

8) Pope hats
"Because of this terrible economy, I'm having to shut down my business. I have OVER 1300 Pope hats (replicas) that I REALLY need to get rid of. The pope hats came from China and are a little too small for most adult heads and are also irritating to the skin, so you would need to have long hair or wear a smaller hat underneath (just like the REAL POPE). Dogs do not like to wear these pope hats, but maybe a large cat or maybe a nice dog would wear one."

9) Need someone to hide easter eggs in my apartment when im not home
"I need someone to hide easter eggs in my apt when i am not there ! They are small and filled with candy! I would like to find them myself on sunday! I am willing to pay! Serious inquiries only!"

10) Free couch, if you can bend time and/or space
"I have a free couch for anyone who can get it back out of my room. It's a comfy couch, cool stripe velvet in great shape, impossibly uncomfortable sleeper, but otherwise easily worth $50-75 bucks in Craigslist land. So why am I listing in for free? Because I am pretty sure it is physically impossible to remove this thing from my second story bedroom down the narrow hallway, down the narrower staircase and out the front door of my little Victorian duplex."

11) I took your purse and felt a connection
"Tuesday night around 11:30. On 53rd btw 1st and 2nd. You came out of the subway and I followed you. You looked over your shoulder, saw me and started walking faster. I ran up, grabbed your arm, took your purse and ran away. I've done many a snatch-and-grab but no one has ever stuck in my mind like you. There was a quick moment when our eyes met that I felt something strong. I think you felt it too. If I wasn't so shy (or so committing a crime) I would have asked your name. I, of course, later got your name from your drivers license. So Jennifer if you'd like to get together for a drink sometime get back to me."

12) Looking for bridesmaids
"So, my fiancee and I are getting married in June. He has 8 groomsmen lined up and I only have one bridesmaid. So, I need some girls who are attractive and around my age to stand up in my wedding. You can be single or taken. It doesn't matter....you just have to be hot. But, not hotter then me. Email me for more information. The wedding will be in Madison and you won't have to pay for a thing."

13) Do you have a small, incontinent dog?
"Or perhaps you work for a small dog rescue of some sort. Either way, I have a package of small doggy diapers. I don't want to throw them out coz they are pretty expensive. (as someone with a small, incontnent dog would already know). Please don't try to put them on a cat. It won't work. Trust me."

14) My teeth
"I left my Dentures in your Silverado last night. I gave you my number but did not get yours. Please call me asap. I need my teeth. We met in the parking lot of Margarita Jones. Get back to me asap please. Thank you."

15) Disgruntled American seeks Canadian for political asylum, maybe more
"Are you a lonely, possibly desperate Canadian woman aged 18-50? Tired of trying to find a good man among your flannel clad, Labatt's drinking, moose hunting country men? Willing to take in an American who is fed up with his country? Then I'm the guy for you! Maybe you're a bit overweight or suffer from "Lifelong Ugly Duckling" syndrome. I don't care."

16) Autographed copy of Plato's Republic
"1st edition of The Republic signed by its author. There is of course a reasonable amount of wear and tear, (light highlighting and underlining, dog-eared pages, back cover missing, etc.), but it is in overall good condition considering its age."

17) Ferocious attack kitten
"This destructive kitty has been trained as a proud warrior and will fiercely defend your house, even against you. Has a very soft and furry belly, like a teddy bear - however he will bite your face if you try to touch it. For the love of God, someone please take this thing out of my house."

18) Free - international ketchup packet collection
"This is a collection of ketchup packets from around the world. approximately 25 countries are represented here, including japan, finland, estonia, greenland, brazil, and portugal. none of the packets have been opened and they are labeled with their home country. Collection comes in decorative box with ducks on it."

19) Personal texting assistant
"I get 40 - 50 texts an hour, I cant handle my workload plus texting responsibilities. My phone gets too full and needs deleted every couple hours. This is a full time position and you must be where ever I am at, because my phone is always with me. Serious inquiries only."

20) 300 stuffed penguins
"I'm going through a pretty weird time in my life right now--having just gone through a break-up and graduated college and temporarily living in my parents' house before I move out for good in in the fall, though I remain unemployed because my philosophy degree is at *such* a premium--and sifting through my room (which has become a strange amalgam of my adolescence and burgeoning adulthood), it's been brought to my attention that I probably won't "catch a man" or have anyone believe I'm about to turn 23 with 300 penguins and a bunch of purple furniture around, that looking at my current room one might think some sort of 13-year-old with developmental issues is living here."

As part of the anti-smoking campaign, they tell you that kissing a smoker is like licking an ashtray, "how grossss."

As someone who rarely/never smokes, I would like to say that I kissed a regular smoker and I love the way it tastes and smells on another person. It's kind of savoring dusty pastries. Ok, it's better than it sounds, really.



Note: two weeks until Vermont. Two month body detox, yay ou nay? No sex, no drinking... but I might secretly bring some reefer.

1. (pussyfooting) + (beating around the bush)=

"Stop pussyfooting around the bushes"


2. (tits or gtfo) + (pics or it didn't happen)=

"pics or gtfo amirite"


3. (you get my point by now) + (im beating a dead horse)=

"You get my beaten dead horse by now"


...

I get it from my father, the man who says

"it's raining dog and cat"

I'm not















PULLED A FAST ONE ON YA, LIFE!!!! ta haaaaaaaa